A thread about adding a new teamie
A little story that happened a while back, when a woman joined one of my all-male teams. I put it to words because I’ve seen how easy it is to mismanage this important transition. I say the key learning really directly, even though it’s a subtle and challenging one: everyone else can be wrong.
This is one for male managers (like me) who have hired a lady onto your dude team. You might find that your new hire is openly questioning people’s work in meetings, pushing back on decisions and annoying your dudes.
To deal with this what you do in your next 1-1 is tell her that she is doing great work, she’s bringing excellent energy and you want to know what you can do to support her, to help her do more.
That you see her teamies are not appreciating it but that you support her 100% and will be helping those dudes find acceptance. Keep saying that in followup chats.
Then in team calls you nod your head and say “I agree with this” or make sure your newbie gets the floor - just really throw your influence behind it.
When you 1-1 with your dudes listen to their venting; correct them if they’re unfactual; cut them off if they get personal; tell them you think her approach is good for the team and that the tone is, actually, not aggressive or personal. Help them find acceptance and peace.
While you’re doing all that find ways to humanize everyone to each other e.g. by giving personal insight in 1-1s, by repping or big-upping, by team socializing.
If you can do this consistently enough you will hopefully find the team reforms, better than ever. You won’t get there though without consistent, proactive, values-driven leadership.
Q&A:
Q: What if her tone IS aggressive?
A: Bruh.
Q: What if things get personal?
A: Be a manager and fix that shit.
Q: If the whole team complains, surely they’re right?
A: Listen, don’t accept. Everyone CAN be wrong about a thing. Stick to your values.
Stick to your values.
Here’s the original thread on twitter:
https://twitter.com/MDCore/status/1333937724714344450
